Final thoughts on a Final Post

I've decided to make this the final post. I imagine many of you have already started to break down into deep depression. Thoughts of death and loneliness permeate through your body wondering what will life be like without this irregularly updated blog. Much like when your favorite TV series ends, you feel empty. Is tomorrow really worth seeing now that this blog is gone? The obvious answer is no. What good are you without my poor grammar, abuse of swear words, and pure nonsense? Well fear not, because in death there is life, and where one blog ends another begins.

What's left hanging in the realm of my move back into the not-so-crisp condo? Well, for starters, I found I giant hole behind the light in my bathroom.

Apparently the electrician found it necessary to destroy the wall to install a simple light and since it's hidden NOT tell anyone. Dear electrician, fuck you.

While I'm on the topic of cursing out people, let's talk about ceiling fans. My Emerson ceiling fan requires light bulbs with an "intermediate base". The thing is, I can't find these magical bulbs anywhere! There are definitely no CFL versions of them and there are a million different type of bubs now! The light bulb industry is full blown retarded. So to GE, Emerson fans, and light bulb makers around the world, please break one of your own bulbs and cut yourself with it. You won't be missed. I'm going back to candles; that should be safe...

Most everything that I've had to put together/install has been done so. We've cleaned up a lot. I still need to get some speaker stands for the surround sound, I found some good ones today on Amazon. The last big thing we have to do is the crown molding which I hope to start next week. Once that's done, organization begins, specifically the DVDs. We've got a mess of movies.

Well that's it. I'm not proofreading this because, well, I never have to begin with why start now? I'd like to thank anyone worth thanking and like those who've made things miserable to find a hole, go in it, and then shot yourself. It'll make burying your body much easier.

The End.

Letter to the Board of Briarwood Coachlight

So moving in has sucked. 2 of my biggest issues specifically with the condo itself has been the storage unit and the closets. We don't have a real coat closet. The architect is apparently an idiot and screwed up. We get a pantry closet instead. Dear Architect, go die.

Next is the storage units. Apparently they screwed up again and put the box for FiOS and Comcast in someone's storage unit, so they shifted all the units down to make space. Oh wait! They only shift 3 units down (one being mine) and divided the space between the 3 because it would cost too much to move them all. Thanks a lot. Really appreciate that new space in the back that fits ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

What am I told to do about all this. Nothing, you're fucked. Bend over and take it like a Rahway inmate. (That the State-Pen for out of towners).

So I wrote this slightly polite e-mail to the board stating basically how pissed I am. Where I would've loved to use colorful language, I refrained, though I the internet can only hold so much of my rage. Some of it went into the bathroom when I fucked up the toliet paper holder and contemplating taking the drill to my skull.

Here's the letter:

To the Board of Briarwood-Coachlight:

My name is Teobaldo Fernandez, resident and owner of 12C. Dealing with the fire, construction, and move in has been a grueling process for all individuals, both residents and people working on this. I understand that none of this has been easy. It is my belief that there have been very poor decisions made, which have presented us with no decision making ability.

The impetus for this letter is specifically the storage unit. I was not convinced that the space was truly distributed evenly. I was shocked to find out that only 3 units sacrificed storage space instead of the entire row. Why the burden of poor planning was placed on 3 people instead of the entire building when it came to the cable is beyond me.

The coat closet situation is another point of disappointment. When I received the diagram layout of our condo I was saddened that we lost a closet. But, as sacrifices apparently had to be made I was able to live with it. When we did our first walk-through I was baffled to see the coat closet was not nearly as deep as the diagram had stated. Brian Bolger’s explanation was that the architect “made a mistake”. In no world is that ever a valid excuse. It was bad enough to lose the laundry closet but to lose another half a closet was just putting salt in the wounds; the list of issues goes on.

The purpose of this letter is to inform the Board that as a member of the complex, I am disappointed. Maybe if I knew more of what was going on, or maybe if I was more active in the daily dealings I would be more aware and understanding of the problems. I can only now judge on the results and my personal experience. When it comes to the closets and the storage units I personally feel cheated and used. I feel there is nothing I can say or do about it, and I do not believe it is fair. We have so little space as is. To keep having more and more taken away has just decreased my morale with what has already been for me a painful mood. The fact that the fire was easier to deal with than the construction speaks volume.

I thank you for taking the time to read my letter. I have no expectations from this but to voice my opinion. I know the Board does do a lot for the community and I am grateful for those things.

Sincerely,

Teobaldo A Fernandez

12C Sentinel Ct

It's all coming to an end

If you haven't heard from my proclamations and curse words from both facebook & twitter, I've got the keys to my brand new, not burned down, Condo. We've got all our furniture in, we've painted, and we've unpacked a ton from the wedding. The place really looks awesome. We've got a sweet LG Washer/Dryer, new appliances, remote-controlled air conditioning, and a brand new Roomba. We've still got a lot of things to do and we probably won't officially be living there until next week but it's good to be so close to done. I've got some pictures at home which I'll be posting and once everything is ready I'm sure a house-warming party will be in order. We'll smoke cigars indoors, keep the gas stove on while playing with flint rocks, and set off some fireworks per Kate Weis's request. After pictures are posted I'll be closing this blog but maybe starting a new one. Something I'll update just about as infrequently as this one but with a new purpose. What will that be? Who knows. For now, I leave you with a great sense of anticipation for the future.

OMG It Happened again!

Unbelievable! One year and 1 day after the my condo burned it's happened again! The whole thing burned to the ground. I can't tell you how furious I am right now. I feel tempted to murder the person responsible. Oh, and we caught the bastard this time. It was this asshole right here.

That's right, Chris FUCKING Evans! The actor is so damn obsessed with his role as the Human Torch in the Fantastic Four movies that he's been burning down homes across America. Luckily, I caught this motherfucker as he was fleeing the scene. You believe this asshole tried to fly out of the complex. He kept screaming "Flame On!" over and over. I proceeded to beat him senseless. He later confessed to several fires and then shat his pants.

Fuck you Chris Evans...Fuck you!

Big yet short update

OK, so I haven't done this in a while. There will be a mirrored post on facebook too.

Here's the skinny so far on the condo. Most of the big external work is done. They started putting up the beams in October and as of now all 3 floors are up, the external and internal fire-walls are done, the windows are in, the A/C units are in, there is a roof with shingles, and the beginning of a deck is there too!

We've already picked out all the items for inside and we've made some upgrades. Granite counter-tops for the kitchen and hardwood floors for most of the condo are the notable ones.

They're doing plumbing and electrical now and we hope to hear soon about the bathroom though I think we're going with just builders grade. We may change the faucets in both the kitchen and bathroom though.

April 1st should be the latest the condo opens. We've already put it on the market so if you know someone who's interested in purchasing a 1-bedroom condo in Chatham give them my e-mail.

Aside from that chaos, I work for LG now in Morristown and the wedding is less that 3.5 months. We met with a priest yesterday and there is a lot to do for the whole Catholic bit.

I'll try and snap some photos of the condo so you can see how it actually exists now and is no longer a pile of rubble and ash.